Like Jay said - everything is spot on.
As of the oil - I would recommend this one
http://www.millersoils.co.uk/automotive/tds-automotive.asp?prodsegmentID=1006§or=Car
Find a 5L pack on ebay, buy 10 litres at the same time - to flush the old one.
To do a complete flush, put the car on the ramp - unplug 2 hoses coming out of the gearbox towards the radiator - read Oil Cooler - start up the engine for about 10 sec - 1 pipe will start pumping out the old oil - the other one will start sucking in the fresh one - stop the engine when you need to get a new oil container. DO NOT let it run dry - switch the ignition off. Eventually you'll see a clean oil coming out of the pipe - that means you've successfully flushed both the gearbox and the torque converter. Don't forget to clean the OIL Cooler as well. IT IS recommended to run 2 oil coolers at the same time - if you push the car to the limits, with normal day to day driving - you wouldn't need to. Also remember - when putting the gearbox in to D or R - the car must stand still there must be no wheel movement - that is why you have N in between them - so when changing the gear - keep in N for a second - then put in to R or D.
As I've managed to damage the gearbox this way - just by changing the gears too quickly in to the R gear from D...
Also, try not to use the Reverse if not necessary, I've noticed that Reverse put a lot of strain on the gearbox, often change to Reverse - don't do any good - based on my own experience. When you hear the BANG when putting the car in to Reverse - that means it's time to look for another gearbox - it might bang for a year or so, but eventually it will fail and you'll be left with NO Reverse gear AT ALL.