Iain@CRD
Lifer
Thats how your left feeling mate after you realise that UK doesnt really give a dam to its working class and would rather help its non working class bums who rake the benefits.
Csa
- Thread starter Iain@CRD
- Start date
Thats how your left feeling mate after you realise that UK doesnt really give a dam to its working class and would rather help its non working class bums who rake the benefits.
Iain@CRD
Lifer
Totally agree mate, our cases are very similar that im surprised! Im thinking on phoning them again but might just have a rant at a stone wall instead, ill probally get more of a reaction that way.
Iain
lingl9z
Member +
Some useful links beatz
Indeed mate the wall talks more sence...
http://www.deadbeatdadsassociation.co.uk/ Check the 'In memory section' its disgusting.
http://www.csahell.com/
Indeed mate the wall talks more sence...
http://www.deadbeatdadsassociation.co.uk/ Check the 'In memory section' its disgusting.
http://www.csahell.com/
lingl9z
Member +
Thanks alot for the info chaps.
Im at work also and i wont be home till around 10pm after i finish 5-a-sides as well so if your about then Stu i can speak then mate, if not then another time.
Ill get reading those links aswell.
Good man hope things get better for you, your not alone!
- Rich.
squeekyduck
Member +
Sorry to hear this guys. It must be tough on ye.
Over here there is nothing like that (CSA) as far as I am aware, I dont know if thats a good thing or bad thing.
Over here there is nothing like that (CSA) as far as I am aware, I dont know if thats a good thing or bad thing.
lingl9z
Member +
Cheers mate.
It's a good thing mate the people that are happy to pay end up getting penalised by the CSA where as the people that run get away with it, so it'd make no diff having them =-] other than making the fathers/parent without care skint and the parent with care rich! like a twisted robin hood!
Iain@CRD
Lifer
Couldnt of said it any better.
Those websites are unreal, it just shows how big of an issue the CSA actually are. People actually wanting to take there own lifes because of huge payment demands by the CSA is just unreal. Surely someone needs to look into the CSA and how they are operating for this to happen ... they seem not to have a comment on either case.
Iain
lingl9z
Member +
I know i was reading though the other day and looking at the replies the CSA gave in the papers etc "we are unable to comment on single cases" or somthing like that, somthing needs to be done, but instead the governtment give them more power!!
i completly agree your being robbed but i still think you should provide for you kiddy as its not there decision not to see you its ur exs so at least u know ur providing a good living for ur kid good look mate
Phil
Super Moderator
id actually be quite proud of yourselfs, ok mistakes have been made, maybe even the entire problem could be described as a mistake, but your dealing with it as best you can.
your payin what you have to, yes your complaining understandbly but your child is getting looked after with that money, even if your hate-EX is wasting most on it on herself, that can actually provide a better atmosphere for the child.
if your ex, was raging that she couldnt afford the child then she probably treat it worse or if she couldnt afford clothes holidays she maybe get pissed off with the baby or blame him/her/you. women are moody vindictive creatures. they work the opposite way to men, a woman can happily be dependant on your money and the tax payers money and think somehow they deserve it cause of the baby, a man has to be able to provide for himself, a fella couldnt let himself do what they do!
either way, we can all see that you guys are being screwed unfairly but your doing the right thing stayin with the system and indirectly protecting your son or daughter.
Phil
your payin what you have to, yes your complaining understandbly but your child is getting looked after with that money, even if your hate-EX is wasting most on it on herself, that can actually provide a better atmosphere for the child.
if your ex, was raging that she couldnt afford the child then she probably treat it worse or if she couldnt afford clothes holidays she maybe get pissed off with the baby or blame him/her/you. women are moody vindictive creatures. they work the opposite way to men, a woman can happily be dependant on your money and the tax payers money and think somehow they deserve it cause of the baby, a man has to be able to provide for himself, a fella couldnt let himself do what they do!
either way, we can all see that you guys are being screwed unfairly but your doing the right thing stayin with the system and indirectly protecting your son or daughter.
Phil
Kelly
Member +
I know its no excuse for ppl like yourself but its probably due to the fact that they come across some many 'fathers' who use the DNA method as a way of stalling payments etc I know if you do the test and it comes back that you are not the father than no costs are sent your way.
Have to say i hear so many horror stories of the CSA but its worked really well for me in my situation. Ryans dad and I had a private agreement and he just randomly stopped paying me when he wanted so i told him i was going to get the money through the CSA from now on and now they take more money off him then i was asking for in the first place.
Every now and then he tries to con his way out of more money i.e he claims expenses for when he travels up to see his son once a fortnight (he moved 230 mile away from us) but again luckily the CSA comes across this behaviour all the time and only reduce the payments a tiny amount.
But then someone close to our family owes back payments on his CSA and he doesnt mind paying for his daughters upbringing but they are taking 40% of his weekly wage off him and they think its acceptable. Rather than the usual 15%. And now with the country tits up his hours have been reduced drastically yet their percentage remains the same.
It really is a funny system and i sympathise for the fathers that do wanna pay for their children and get treated the wrong way.
Have to say i hear so many horror stories of the CSA but its worked really well for me in my situation. Ryans dad and I had a private agreement and he just randomly stopped paying me when he wanted so i told him i was going to get the money through the CSA from now on and now they take more money off him then i was asking for in the first place.
Every now and then he tries to con his way out of more money i.e he claims expenses for when he travels up to see his son once a fortnight (he moved 230 mile away from us) but again luckily the CSA comes across this behaviour all the time and only reduce the payments a tiny amount.
But then someone close to our family owes back payments on his CSA and he doesnt mind paying for his daughters upbringing but they are taking 40% of his weekly wage off him and they think its acceptable. Rather than the usual 15%. And now with the country tits up his hours have been reduced drastically yet their percentage remains the same.
It really is a funny system and i sympathise for the fathers that do wanna pay for their children and get treated the wrong way.
Phil
Super Moderator
it confuese me though as im not sure how id feel in a situation like that.
if i wasnt a major part in a child life and it wasnt my fault ie the mother wanted to be with someone else. the im pretty sure id begrudge every penny she got of mine. like id hate her. maybe commit murder oj lol
Phil
if i wasnt a major part in a child life and it wasnt my fault ie the mother wanted to be with someone else. the im pretty sure id begrudge every penny she got of mine. like id hate her. maybe commit murder oj lol
Phil
Iain@CRD
Lifer
Thanks alot Kelly for sharing that.
I can totally understand why the system is in place for folk who take the piss really, but it always punishes the innocent ones aswell.
I really dont mind paying for my son, i accept responsibility but its the fact that i cannot guarantee that the money is being spent on my son. Fairplay it wis proven id be much happier but i know my son will get a very small amount of that towards him.
Iain
I can totally understand why the system is in place for folk who take the piss really, but it always punishes the innocent ones aswell.
I really dont mind paying for my son, i accept responsibility but its the fact that i cannot guarantee that the money is being spent on my son. Fairplay it wis proven id be much happier but i know my son will get a very small amount of that towards him.
Iain
Kelly
Member +
Yeh some situations are tricky i guess. But when ppl split up just because they have changed and the relationship isnt working and the best thing for the child is to have two happy parents seperately than parents unhappy together it doesn't seem fair to have one parent have the expense of bringing up a child which took two ppl to make.
In my situation for example i could understand the claim to have his money reduced due to travelling expenses if i moved my son away from him, but he chose to move away from us so in my eyes the cost of travel should have been an issue of his own. But sometimes the CSA works ok at being an impartial middle man as such! but obviously not always.
lingl9z
Member +
The System is screwed up in many sences, I totally agree that a father should finace a part of a childs upbringing but at the same time they need to take in to consideration peoples out going like rent, gas, elec, water etc if they can't afford the basic things anymore because the CSA are taking a large amount of there money when the parent with care can easily afford to bring the child up on there own without the csa and clearly states that then why can't they reduce payments so the parent without care can still live happily.
They need to take a look at how much it costs a month the bring a child up and split that between the parents of the child rather than taking it all from the father, I'd happily be the parent with care and at the same time i'd be happy to recieve what im paying i'd be rich.
+ if i was to move out with a partner or get married they take her income in to account and then asses the household so that i end up paying more, They can take anything between 15 and 40% i think, But its pathetic that if the mother with care re-marrys etc why don't they take that in to account?
At the end of the day it shouldnt have anything to do with new partners, they didnt make they child, why should they have to pay? Shame it only works one way...
Rep for input Phil and Kelly!
They need to take a look at how much it costs a month the bring a child up and split that between the parents of the child rather than taking it all from the father, I'd happily be the parent with care and at the same time i'd be happy to recieve what im paying i'd be rich.
+ if i was to move out with a partner or get married they take her income in to account and then asses the household so that i end up paying more, They can take anything between 15 and 40% i think, But its pathetic that if the mother with care re-marrys etc why don't they take that in to account?
At the end of the day it shouldnt have anything to do with new partners, they didnt make they child, why should they have to pay? Shame it only works one way...
Rep for input Phil and Kelly!
Kelly
Member +
Yeh i know what you mean best thing you can do is just be proud that you are not bothered about paying towards his upbringing, and be there for him in anyway possible.
Hopefully if you can sort out some custody of your son than the more you have him overnight per year the less she will recieve. And the more quality time you will get to spend with him. But from your post it seems that in itself will be an expensive goal to achieve